Tag Archives: child view

Memories of Sibling Rivalry: Change is Good

I remember well when my rusty old swing in the back was traded in and in its place, a fancy and shiny blue swing-set with bold white stripes candy-caned around the legs of the set, with a few real swings, and a little swinging carriage for two.

It was an awesome sight, but an unwelcome acknowledgement that it was not mine.  It was ours, purchased to share with my siblings.  This translated in my ears to ‘no longer important’.  It was really them who had gained importance, them for whom the swing was bought.

I can’t explain sibling resentment.  Where did it ferment, and how and why?  I only know that it did.  I know that swing-set was a turning point, an awareness of competition for a shared outdoor space that I had previously manned alone.

Looking at a set of photos snapped during a christmas-present-opening affair, I see the resentment.

I wear it in my posture, ooze it from my expression, project it from my eyes, as I hold my Fisher Price schoolhouse, with magnet letters and little peoples; likely comparing it to the shiny twin tricycles that my siblings are excitedly mounting alongside me.

The irony is that there is another picture of Sis and Bro on their trikes, with me alongside them, all dressed in winter gear, and I’m mounted on a lovely blue bike with lovely long chrome handlebars and a beautiful white banana seat.

Did I acquire that just after the first picture, or was it acquired during the year, likely for a birthday and posed months later?  I couldn’t resist, I went back and looked at that picture and notice that my hairstyle is drastically different and I look a bit older.  I would say that it was the next fall/winter when the picture was taken, meaning that the bicycle was likely a birthday present from late summer.

sibling rivalry

It truly does not matter.  The fact is, I did not like sharing.  My time.  My space.  My toys.  My parents.  My yard, my house, mine, mine,  mine.  I did not like them, can’t make me, I don’t!

I’m really just guessing that’s how it was, I really don’t recall.  That’s what the picture tells me – the one with the Fisher Price schoolhouse.

Honestly?  I do not remember the occasion at all.  What I recall from the picture is the cardboard fireplace, propped against the wall to hang socks from, to resemble an apparatus an expected jolly fat man might come through.

The humor in that does not escape me.

Where Do Kids Get Their Ideas?

I had two special guests this weekend:  my seven-year old granddaughter and her newly discovered seven-year old cousin, my great-niece.

Preparing for the weekend, I had to stretch my eating habits a bit.  I’ve found that most young girls, typical youth anyway, are not health conscious and are certainly not aware of organic foods and natural products.  They’re typically pretty picky about their food, as am I, but we see things completely different.

Assembling the donuts, the pizza plans, the sports drinks, I was contemplating how those items were going to affect my newly discovered waist line.  Ah, we all have to stretch a bet now and then, right?

So, we’re having a fabulous time, we three gals, cavorting in the backyard pool.  The girls are off to the side, having some girl-talk when I hear, “Aunt Trish – do you go to church?”

“No, but I do get together with other believers.”

“Then you don’t know God, ” she states, very matter-of-fact.

Why would a child think that I couldn’t possibly know about God if I didn’t go to church?

That sent my mind reeling.  How do I explain to a seven-year old that I follow a different God – a God who doesn’t require me to go to church, but who requires that I do get together with other believers?

I simply replied, “Oh, I know all about God.”

“But you can’t know everything,” she retorted.

True that, dear child, true that.