Fall splendor in the Midwest. A diversity of colors and textures.
Fall splendor in the Midwest. A diversity of colors and textures.
How often in life do you find someone who hits all the notes?
Seriously. I’m not talking about ringing your orgasmic bell in multiple positions, I’m talking about what makes up your whole being, the tune, the tremor, the composition, the key. A human being whose orchestration is identical to your own.
There seems to be a lengthy pause. A recollecting of the individual nuances and rhythms, the high notes and low notes.
Not one person is an absolutely perfect match.
There is going to be, somewhere, at some point in the melody, a disharmony. A chord that doesn’t blend, a flat where there should be a sharp, an overlap of keys.
It’s no wonder that the cultural expectation of true love, the fairy-tale fed expectation of happily-ever-after, is an elusive composition most often ending in a separation.
As a finely tuned human, you are going to have your own melodies, your own rhythms.
You likely know that a Bach type will likely not mesh well with a Joan Jett type. Similarly, the Celtic Bagpipes camp is going to be at odds with the Lil Wayne camp.
Accordingly, you make your choice for companions, be it in friendship or partnering, by matching your ‘music’ as best you can. Perhaps even finding someone who fits a two or three-part harmony on occasion.
Then, because life is simply not simple, there will be an unexpected change in tempo at some point, for you or the other party/parties, which changes the balance so much that the chords compete drastically with each other.
How do you handle that?
It’s certainly not the same for every person, but I can tell you how My Love and I handled such a change: by communicating. Sure, that involved a few loud discussions. It certainly involved a few tears. I hate to admit this, but on one occasion, there were also flying objects.
All of those communications created their own composition. One separate from the rest, but one that told a story of us. A story of understanding both sides of the tune, recognizing that the changed tempo actually got our attention and knocked the figurative stuck needle off the track and allowed us each to find new songs for ourselves.
Thankfully, it turns out those songs were in harmony.
We celebrated this little beauty’s first year recently. An astonishing fact, considering how quickly this time has lapsed.
It’s been a blurry year. One of those mind-numbing, day-in and day-out, so many similarities that they all blend together sort of years. The drudgery, the sameness, mostly blending so completely that before you know, the moments for opportunity are past – passed, slipped on by to become lost time; sometimes regret, sometimes survival. Mostly, just a blur.
Emergency ailments, celebrations, discord and distress, good health, economic woes, family time, work, great friends – all combined to create another assemblage of time. Moments and milestones, smiles and scares.
I’ve worked way too much, and the job project has hit the manic phase – a major program changeover that will wrap in ten weeks, with the primary module going live in three. I’m worn near the frack out. I was not cut out for 80 hour work weeks. They’re an attack to the peace of the home front, and emotional health in general. But the light at the end of the tunnel is now much less dim.
Time to start preparing for the next stage.
Hubby and I are scheduled to host our youngest grandbabe this next spring, spending a full week with her sweetness. In the interim, we think we need to arrange more visits to get to know her better – so we won’t be such strangers when she makes her special visit to our home.
Shortly after that visit, we hope to attain some serious financial freedom – an opportunity to make remodeling plans for this ol’ home of ours. Providing that there are no surprises between now and then, the first on my list will be a new main floor bathroom. Dreams sometimes become reality, right?
Then fall plans include a meet-up with a dear friend, one of my Torah community members, to celebrate a Holy day and travel time visiting places and spaces where I’ve never been.
In the meantime, life is moving along at the full-steam sameness. Yet, as much as that feels like reality, it’s really not is it?
The world is changing every moment, little bits and pieces bouncing around, pinging off each other, creating actions and reactions that not a single one of us can accurately predict.
We live, we die.
In the in-between, lies reality.
Sh’ma Yisra’eil – Return to the Law.
Torah Law, that is… the religion of the Hebrews.
I can keep it, it’s not terrifically hard, but it doesn’t matter.
Outside the land – It doesn’t matter.
I can live my life restrained only by civil law – eat, drink and be merry. An ocean away, across the border, on the moon… as long as I’m not in the land chosen by Almighty, the Law is not a matter to much concern me.
So why am I so morose, so concerned with doing what YHWH commanded? What keeps me on course, holding the line, standing apart and keeping separate from everyone and everything I know? Why do I not just blend in, become a comfortable fit with society, with culture, with family and friends and community?
If nothing else, so that I can sleep well at night, so that I can practice what I believe with all of my heart. Even if my obedience makes no difference, none. Inconsequential, insignificant. Important only to me. Important only that by extension, I hope to revere YHWH by keeping the commands.
Truly, YHWH said I will bless them that bless you and curse them that curse you – by you all of the families of the earth will be blessed.
Not me. Almighty didn’t say that about me.
Not anyone outside the land. Other nations didn’t get this condition, this special selection.
Only Israel. Chosen resident of the land.
So hey there Israel – Are you listening?!? – people in the land, citizens, strangers, residents of all shapes, sizes and beliefs – do you not believe YHWH?
Are you fearless, thinking Almighty, YHWH will not require?
The land is chosen, deliberately; forever claimed by YHWH – a possession only lent to others as punishment to those peoples who defiled it, those who denied that YHWH owned the land.
Israel – pay attention before you also are spewed from the land! Please!
There are terms. There are conditions. Go back and search for the God of your father Abraham. Look to the ancients, those Hebrews who came out of Egypt to serve your Almighty, and repair your ways. Strip your extraneous laws and traditions and return to YHWH who chose you – to be the blessing, to dwell safely in the land, to become the rightful servants of YHWH.
Find your priests, the sons of Aaron. Ask them to take their stand, to resume their required positions. Support them. Give them reason to seek YHWH, to inquire of, and worship YHWH as they have been commanded. Ask them to seek out the old ways, the ways of Abraham. Ask them to become servants of YHWH, as designed.
Kick those fucking rabbis to the curb. Eject them from the land if you have to, if they, like others before them, refuse to honor the established hierarchy set forth by YHWH. If they continue to usurp the position of authority set forth by YHWH, then send them away. They lead you astray.
The rest of us are counting on you – whether we know it or not – our future hangs in the balance, waiting on you. All of the families of the earth are looking and hoping for a thing that will not happen without you.
Save yourselves, and allow us to rejoice in your resumed status, as Chosen of YHWH, rightful residents of the Land of Israel, Land of YHWH.
Oh Almighty, God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.
I and my predecessors and my offspring have sinned and done exceedingly wrong before you.
Your laws have been spurned and cast aside, your priests denied and your dwelling treated as naught.
Your creation has been given no rest and your land is profaned.
Your people no longer know your Law and your Priests no longer know your people.
Justice is treated as wrong-doing and wrong-doings are treated as just.
Knowledge has become base and lawless and laws of men exceed all boundaries.
Men think themselves gods and make mere men their gods. Is there no hope for mankind? Is there no turning back to do right?
I see people whose intents seem good, yet they know you not. Will they get the chance?
Will you remember the Land and remember the Covenant?
Is there yet a remnant left to glorify Almighty God?
Are there yet punishments to be dealt and accepted?
Praise you, oh Almighty God – your mercy gives me hope, although my transgressions are many!
Thank you for Yom Kippur and the yearly cleansing of our souls.
May your established laws and statutes be forever known and kept to make difference between the clean and the unclean and the Holy and the unholy, to show glory to Almighty, God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.
If you build it, they will come;
and if they’re welcome, they will stay.
If they become nuisances,
keep the door open,
as others will come to tame them.
– lessons learned, garden 2015.